Just when it seemed she most needed time for a long meditation, time was in short supply for Zhizhu. On the heels of the action she’d taken to save the hunter’s—Shin’s—life, there came news of Kiku’s abduction by Chinese wraiths. The uji cared for Kiku, each in their own way. Zhihzu knew there were few people who could claim the devotion the Scouts showed towards the former geisha. Even as a wraith, a threat to the once-vibrant young woman could spur them to immediate action.
No doubt they’d cobble together some sort of plan before going into the Shadowlands to rescue Kiku. But the long drive back, crouched low on her motorcycle, would give her time to reflect on what had happened with Shin.
She was still uncertain as to why she’d let him live. Let him? She’d actually worked rather hard to keep him alive. She’d struggled to take out the harpoon head without further injuring him; she’d given him her own chi-laden blood to heal him. She hadn’t just let him live, she’d actively saved his life.
She had meant what she’d said, about his death being no boon to the city. While the Shih had taken up their mantle as hunters of their own accord, they performed a necessary and important function. She was somehow comforted by the fact that if she became an akuma, there would be someone there to stop her. Someone with no emotional ties to her, who would not hesitate to kill her if she became corrupted.
And yet, she knew she could trust her uji to fulfill that duty, should that day come. Despite any bonds they had, she knew even soft-hearted Shard would not hesitate to strike a killing blow. Her confusion over the incident lent strength to her P’o; she’d come far too close to losing control of her demon back in the alley where she’d found him. There was some truth to her demon’s rant about having Shin as her creature, and a part of her was curious to know how someone like him would fare as her victim.
She could not do that, however. She didn’t know the extent of his powers, and there was no guarantee that he’d have been helpless even in his injured state. Besides, to break him she’d have had to heal him, and then he definitely would have been dangerous. Add to that the fact that torture had not been very enlightening for her since breaking Yi. She remembered the warnings of her teachers not to plunge too quickly into her role as a demon. Each step along the Road Back was more difficult. It was best not to become jaded early in her life as a gaki.
She thought of the other tenets of her dharma, those which spoke of passion and fire. It was time to turn her thoughts towards these tenets. There was that nightclub she’d been thinking of opening—it would be a good opportunity to “seek the brightest embers and feed them until become bonfires.” Her mind suddenly supplied her with an image of Shin, barely clad, and she would have blushed had she been scarlet-cycled. There would be time to explore that particular option later. Maybe if she just fucked him and got it over with, she’d have an end to this annoying conflict of emotion.
She smiled, a feeling of certainty coming back to her. She didn’t need to fret and worry over the hunter. It didn’t really matter why she’d saved his life—just that she’d done it. If he became a problem later, she’d handle it. And if she had the opportunity, she’d handle him in a quite different way. Maybe it wouldn’t even come to that; she’d gotten turned on, but it could have been something about the situation. Whatever it was, she’d deal with it when the time came.
Feeling much better, she returned her thoughts to the approaching rescue mission.
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